Grounded By Chuck
She led me into a room filled with what looked to be normal people. I even saw a couple of people I knew, but mostly is was a room full of strangers. I felt uncomfortable and anxious, and it showed as I kept wiggling in my seat. Finally, everyone else took their seats, and she stood up and began to speak.
“Hello everyone. My name is May, and I am a groceryshop-a-holic.” I let out a deep breath. There were other people out there who had the same problem. I had been living with this shame for the last 20 years of my life, much like the 14 cases of tuna I bought on sale in 1987 and had hidden under the bed.
“I haven’t over-shopped for groceries in 2 years, 6 months, and 14 days, thanks to the grace of God and the help of this group” she said. “As a matter of fact, I actually have let myself run out of lettuce twice this month, and there is absolutely no tomato sauce in my house at this time.”
The audience gasped at first, then broke into applause for the strength that May had shown. Anyone who could let themselves run of out of lettuce must have the will power of a thousand men. And no tomato sauce? What if somebody drops by and she suddenly needs to fix spaghetti for 6?
“Is there anyone else who would like to speak today?” she asked. A lone woman in the back raised her hand. As she stood we could all see that she was crying. An older woman beside her was holding her hand, and slowly stroking it.
“Hi everyone. My name is Cindy, and I am a groceryshop-a-holic” she began. “I am here today at my mothers urging. I didn’t want to admit that I had a problem for so long. But last week, when my husband went to gamble at the casino, he found that I had wiped out our savings and bought groceries with it.”
“He said he would leave me if I didn’t get help. I still denied it. Then, two days ago. I called my mother and asked if I could borrow some money so that Jim could go to the horse track. Then I took that 5 dollars and I bought saltines with it because they were on sale for 5 for $5.
“That evening, when my mom called Jim to see if he had won any money, the whole thing blew up. He packed his bags and left, and Mom finally got me to see that I had a serious problem. She told me how this kind of thing runs in families, and how, when I was a kid, she took all of Dad’s liquor money and spent it at the meat market on stuff that she froze and later fed us for supper. I never knew that was the real reason my parents were divorced.”
After that, the conversation went around the room, with some people talking about how they had gotten better, some talking about their daily struggles, and a few that still could not see how they could pass up ground beef at 99cents/lb, even if it was 70/30.
Finally the meeting was over, and I smiled to myself, knowing that, although this is something that I will struggle with for the rest of my life, there are people I can turn to when I feel the urge to buy 40 boxes of taco shells just because they are 3 for $1. And maybe one day, Jim will forgive Cindy, and they too can out their lives back together.
Then again, who could ever forgive someone for spending their gambling money on food?
“Hello everyone. My name is May, and I am a groceryshop-a-holic.” I let out a deep breath. There were other people out there who had the same problem. I had been living with this shame for the last 20 years of my life, much like the 14 cases of tuna I bought on sale in 1987 and had hidden under the bed.
“I haven’t over-shopped for groceries in 2 years, 6 months, and 14 days, thanks to the grace of God and the help of this group” she said. “As a matter of fact, I actually have let myself run out of lettuce twice this month, and there is absolutely no tomato sauce in my house at this time.”
The audience gasped at first, then broke into applause for the strength that May had shown. Anyone who could let themselves run of out of lettuce must have the will power of a thousand men. And no tomato sauce? What if somebody drops by and she suddenly needs to fix spaghetti for 6?
“Is there anyone else who would like to speak today?” she asked. A lone woman in the back raised her hand. As she stood we could all see that she was crying. An older woman beside her was holding her hand, and slowly stroking it.
“Hi everyone. My name is Cindy, and I am a groceryshop-a-holic” she began. “I am here today at my mothers urging. I didn’t want to admit that I had a problem for so long. But last week, when my husband went to gamble at the casino, he found that I had wiped out our savings and bought groceries with it.”
“He said he would leave me if I didn’t get help. I still denied it. Then, two days ago. I called my mother and asked if I could borrow some money so that Jim could go to the horse track. Then I took that 5 dollars and I bought saltines with it because they were on sale for 5 for $5.
“That evening, when my mom called Jim to see if he had won any money, the whole thing blew up. He packed his bags and left, and Mom finally got me to see that I had a serious problem. She told me how this kind of thing runs in families, and how, when I was a kid, she took all of Dad’s liquor money and spent it at the meat market on stuff that she froze and later fed us for supper. I never knew that was the real reason my parents were divorced.”
After that, the conversation went around the room, with some people talking about how they had gotten better, some talking about their daily struggles, and a few that still could not see how they could pass up ground beef at 99cents/lb, even if it was 70/30.
Finally the meeting was over, and I smiled to myself, knowing that, although this is something that I will struggle with for the rest of my life, there are people I can turn to when I feel the urge to buy 40 boxes of taco shells just because they are 3 for $1. And maybe one day, Jim will forgive Cindy, and they too can out their lives back together.
Then again, who could ever forgive someone for spending their gambling money on food?
posted by Rick Quick | 7:07 AM
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