A Wolf In Sheep’s Clothing and Matching Purse
I don’t spend much of my time thinking about the clothes that I wear. I get up in the morning, find a shirt and pants that are somewhat related in color, and head out the door to the office. That’s about as much though as I give them. This is probably the reason then that I can’t understand the attachment between women and their clothes.
Women actually seem to have a relationship with their clothes. In the beginning, they bring them home and are so happy that they have found them. Soon, though, they forget about how special the clothes once were, and doom them to spend eternity in a dark space in the back of the closet. And then, just as all hope is gone, they stumble upon them while looking for something to wear to the ball, and once again, and a star is re-born.
I tell you, my eyes get all watery, and my heart starts pounding just thinking about it. However, this love affair with clothing does tend to make women do some rather odd things.
For example, they will say to a friend “Oh my but that shirt is just darling on you! May I borrow it sometime?” Do you honestly this is something a man would ever do? I think not. I mean, geez, can you imagine John Wayne doing that?
“Well I’ll tell ya, pilgrim, them’s some might fine britches you got on there. Mind if I mosey on over this weekend and hitch ‘em up fer a spell?” Nope, that just ain’t gonna happen.
Women will stand at their closet door, look out over 6 acres of hanging clothes, and scream “I have nothing to wear!” Please note guys, that this is NOT an invitation for you to stick your 2 cents worth in about how there are 6 acres of hanging clothes in the closet. There are rumors that Richard Simmons once did that to his momma when he was a kid, and just look at him now.
Women will also shop for hours to find something that matches something they already bought. It could be shoes, a purse, pants, a blouse, a hat, or a turkey feather, but their need for something to match it overwhelms them, and the next thing you know, 38 hours have passed, and you are still at the mall. Which always makes me wonder, why did they buy the dang un-matched thing in the first place?
And on top of all of this, after days of shopping, borrowing, and matching, the woman will get dressed and then go and ask a guy to tell her how she looks. What sense does this make? She just spent 3 weeks matching the stripe in her purse to the stitching on her shoes, and then she asks for an opinion from someone wearing a Hawaiian shirt, wrinkled khaki’s, and work boots?
It all leaves me befuddled and amazed, in fear and in shock, at the sheer time and devotion women put into something that most of us men just take for granted. I’ll never understand this anymore than I understand why you aren’t supposed to wear white after labor day. For some reason, men and women just don’t fell the same about clothes.
I hear this all started when Eve looked at Adam and asked “Does this fig leaf make my butt look big?’
Women actually seem to have a relationship with their clothes. In the beginning, they bring them home and are so happy that they have found them. Soon, though, they forget about how special the clothes once were, and doom them to spend eternity in a dark space in the back of the closet. And then, just as all hope is gone, they stumble upon them while looking for something to wear to the ball, and once again, and a star is re-born.
I tell you, my eyes get all watery, and my heart starts pounding just thinking about it. However, this love affair with clothing does tend to make women do some rather odd things.
For example, they will say to a friend “Oh my but that shirt is just darling on you! May I borrow it sometime?” Do you honestly this is something a man would ever do? I think not. I mean, geez, can you imagine John Wayne doing that?
“Well I’ll tell ya, pilgrim, them’s some might fine britches you got on there. Mind if I mosey on over this weekend and hitch ‘em up fer a spell?” Nope, that just ain’t gonna happen.
Women will stand at their closet door, look out over 6 acres of hanging clothes, and scream “I have nothing to wear!” Please note guys, that this is NOT an invitation for you to stick your 2 cents worth in about how there are 6 acres of hanging clothes in the closet. There are rumors that Richard Simmons once did that to his momma when he was a kid, and just look at him now.
Women will also shop for hours to find something that matches something they already bought. It could be shoes, a purse, pants, a blouse, a hat, or a turkey feather, but their need for something to match it overwhelms them, and the next thing you know, 38 hours have passed, and you are still at the mall. Which always makes me wonder, why did they buy the dang un-matched thing in the first place?
And on top of all of this, after days of shopping, borrowing, and matching, the woman will get dressed and then go and ask a guy to tell her how she looks. What sense does this make? She just spent 3 weeks matching the stripe in her purse to the stitching on her shoes, and then she asks for an opinion from someone wearing a Hawaiian shirt, wrinkled khaki’s, and work boots?
It all leaves me befuddled and amazed, in fear and in shock, at the sheer time and devotion women put into something that most of us men just take for granted. I’ll never understand this anymore than I understand why you aren’t supposed to wear white after labor day. For some reason, men and women just don’t fell the same about clothes.
I hear this all started when Eve looked at Adam and asked “Does this fig leaf make my butt look big?’
posted by Rick Quick | 7:06 AM
1 Comments:
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