Reasons to quit Having Reasons
Every day, it seems, that some list gets emailed to me. I am sure y’all get these types of lists too. They come from a friend who has filled it out with all sorts of information, such as their favorite color, brand of detergent they use, or how often they bathe. Now, they have sent this to me and expect me to fill this out and send it to my other friends.
This is the called the “I really don’t want to know that much about you” pyramid scheme. The object of the scheme is to get someone to reveal something that you can use to blackmail them with later.
Some of the questions I have been asked this week include: How often do you shave your legs? Do you like to snuggle when you sleep? Paper or plastic? Is real love blind? Would you do absolutely anything to make me happy (providing it's legal)? If you had to give up sex or just being held, which one could you just NOT live the rest of your life without? Is the best kind of love a) warm, nurturing, constant and enduring, or b) madly exciting, dangerous, all-consuming, and self-absorbed?
It just never stops! Every day, there seems to be a new one in my mailbox. And everyday, I learn something about a friend that I just really did not want to know!
My friend up in the frigid north? I now know all about her wild college years, her husbands chronic bout with gout, and what they like to do after it gets dark and why the kids are wearing protective eye and ear wear. Another friend further south identifies what parts of her body are the hairiest, which diseases she has had in the past, and how many times she has fooled around on her present husband.
For heavens sake, doesn’t she realize that someone is going to email that to him? Then again, maybe she does, and is trying to keep her count higher than his.
Anywho, the whole point of this is that I no longer want to know anything about anybody. I have friends, and I have enemies, and I want to like or dislike them for the reason I already have, and not for the reasons they are emailing me each day. And as for me providing information back to anyone, well, let’s just say that the chances are better of seeing two dogs dance the Tango.
After all, unless you are out Christmas shopping, do you really want to know whether I am a “boxers or briefs” kind of guy anyway?
This is the called the “I really don’t want to know that much about you” pyramid scheme. The object of the scheme is to get someone to reveal something that you can use to blackmail them with later.
Some of the questions I have been asked this week include: How often do you shave your legs? Do you like to snuggle when you sleep? Paper or plastic? Is real love blind? Would you do absolutely anything to make me happy (providing it's legal)? If you had to give up sex or just being held, which one could you just NOT live the rest of your life without? Is the best kind of love a) warm, nurturing, constant and enduring, or b) madly exciting, dangerous, all-consuming, and self-absorbed?
It just never stops! Every day, there seems to be a new one in my mailbox. And everyday, I learn something about a friend that I just really did not want to know!
My friend up in the frigid north? I now know all about her wild college years, her husbands chronic bout with gout, and what they like to do after it gets dark and why the kids are wearing protective eye and ear wear. Another friend further south identifies what parts of her body are the hairiest, which diseases she has had in the past, and how many times she has fooled around on her present husband.
For heavens sake, doesn’t she realize that someone is going to email that to him? Then again, maybe she does, and is trying to keep her count higher than his.
Anywho, the whole point of this is that I no longer want to know anything about anybody. I have friends, and I have enemies, and I want to like or dislike them for the reason I already have, and not for the reasons they are emailing me each day. And as for me providing information back to anyone, well, let’s just say that the chances are better of seeing two dogs dance the Tango.
After all, unless you are out Christmas shopping, do you really want to know whether I am a “boxers or briefs” kind of guy anyway?
posted by Rick Quick | 11:34 AM
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